Neuer: The quadopus who changed how the game was played

Not many footballers can honestly claim to have transformed an entire position with their playing style. Manuel Neuer was and is different.   Who’s this then? Manuel Peter Neuer is a 34-year-old goalkeeper who stands 6ft 4ins tall and was born in Gelsenkirchen, in what was then West Germany. Widely regarded as one of, if […]

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Liverpool v Man City: One big game, five big questions

Can Thiago do something different? That’s one question ahead of the huge Premier League clash between Liverpool and Manchester City on Sunday.   1) Will Liverpool actually score a goal at Anfield? Four games against Southampton, Manchester United, Burnley and Brighton at Anfield; no goals for Liverpool. Seventy-two shots, just 11 on target; no goals […]

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Big Weekend: Liverpool v Man City, Pogba, Mourinho, Saints

Paul Pogba and Jose Mourinho are both in Big Weekend like it’s 2017. But the headline game can only ever be Liverpool v Manchester City.   Game to watch – Liverpool v Manchester City When Manchester City hosted Liverpool in early January 2019, Pep Guardiola’s side was third and trailed the Premier League leaders and […]

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16 Conclusions: Tottenham 0-1 Chelsea

More encouraging signs for Chelsea under Thomas Tuchel, but Spurs are playing some extraordinary football right now. And not in a good way.   1) We’re not going to lie, most of these are going to be about Spurs because… well, bloody hell that was quite something. But we should at least start with the […]

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Mourinho can only envy Klopp’s fatigued family…

A London tourist (remember them?) would not have captured as many smileys as there were in Liverpool’s squad over the past week. From James Milner’s passive aggressive stance then belated smiley face substitution on Sunday to Gini Wijnaldum’s fixed grin after a delicious third goal against the Hammers, this was a team that remembered how […]

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Perfect Potter pilots Premier League winners and losers

Graham Potter engineered a fine victory over Liverpool, who cannot bully those at the bottom anymore. There is love for Brendan Rodgers.   Winners Graham Potter What a performance. It was understandably and justifiably lost in the rubble of the fallen fortress that is Anfield, but Brighton were absolutely sensational on Wednesday. Over the course […]

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Does nerdy vegetarian Tuchel have any hope in England?

Thomas Tuchel seems a decent guy with a clear plan for what he wants to achieve at Chelsea and how he wants to do it. That much seems obvious from his early days in the job. It also seems obvious that he has almost no chance of staying beyond his 18-month contract – a deal […]

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Laziness? Golf? Why can’t Gareth Bale just fade away?

Gareth Bale’s much-publicised return to Spurs was met with optimism by many. Finally free from the shackles of that dastardly Zinedine Zidane, Tottenham fans were delighted to have arguably their greatest Premier League player back at the club. A club he loves. A club where he wouldn’t sulk and shuffle through the corridors, halfway between […]

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Prick of the Week No. 20: Southampton go full Gareth Keenan

We’ll be honest, it’s been a struggle at times in the last few weeks to identify a solid prick candidate given the inevitably dwindling list of candidates not already hit with the pricking stick. This week there were bloody loads of pricks, though, even allowing for the fact that Jose Mourinho (general joy-sapping death-spiral miserabilism) […]

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Early winners: Sheffield United, now just probably f***ed

There’s no doubt that it was a motivation. “The lads 100 per cent don’t want that tag. I don’t want the embarrassment of being remembered for the wrong reason at Sheffield United after seven or eight years at the club,” said Chris Basham on January 1 as he pondered Derby’s 11-point record, which looked a […]

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